Dramatic title you say, but it's literal. My bad karma has made her rounds and slapped me in the face with the flu.
Yesterday I felt like I was knocking on death's door. I couldn't move without thinking I tore a muscle.
The flu is kicking me in the teeth, truthfully, even my teeth hurt. After a trip to Urgent Care, two pharmacies, three boxes of Kleenex and multiple doses of Tylenol and Motrin I can breathe without fear of pain.
I thought I was getting a break when I woke up this morning feeling better, until the coughing started. Through the day I started to feel better. Then I slept passed the time I was suppose to take the medicine and I felt worst than I had all day.
Fever is back and my throat and chest are hurting. I guess this is what I get for calling some of my nuggets dementors. Lesson learned.
I'm just hoping to get back to school for our Polar Express Pajama party on Wednesday. I'll be super sad if I have to miss it.
I would much rather be at school then stuck at home feeling like the cars at monster truck shows.
Here's to kicking the flu in his teeth! Wishing this aliment on your enemy! Karma will probably get me for that too huh?
Monday, December 17, 2012
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Sigh
This blog as a prerequisite: dementors. If you are unaware of what a dementor is, first slap yourself, second google it!
I have two dementors in my class, minus the cloaks, but not minus the kiss of death. They drain me, physically, mentally and spiritually. This sounds so horrible now that I see it in print. Maybe I'll wake up feeling differently.
The morning went smoothly. It's after recess that it all goes south! I gave out tickets for a chance at the prize box, know who that worked for? The kids who are well behaved anyways. I shall keep trying everything I can think of, eventually something has got to give! There are plenty of songs that support this theory, so it has to be true! My theory of something has to give, not that my children will eventually behave.
I'm spending the night at my sisters either my three love bugs. We'll see if this was a good idea tomorrow morning!
Today's Pockets:
Paper clip: bent
Tickets: that the kids he to write their names on and put in the jar
Mystery student: another trick in trying picking a kid in the morning from an empty tissue box, and watching them all day. If they follow the rules they get to play on the computer during nap.
I have two dementors in my class, minus the cloaks, but not minus the kiss of death. They drain me, physically, mentally and spiritually. This sounds so horrible now that I see it in print. Maybe I'll wake up feeling differently.
The morning went smoothly. It's after recess that it all goes south! I gave out tickets for a chance at the prize box, know who that worked for? The kids who are well behaved anyways. I shall keep trying everything I can think of, eventually something has got to give! There are plenty of songs that support this theory, so it has to be true! My theory of something has to give, not that my children will eventually behave.
I'm spending the night at my sisters either my three love bugs. We'll see if this was a good idea tomorrow morning!
Today's Pockets:
Paper clip: bent
Tickets: that the kids he to write their names on and put in the jar
Mystery student: another trick in trying picking a kid in the morning from an empty tissue box, and watching them all day. If they follow the rules they get to play on the computer during nap.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
12/12/12...more like 6/6/6
If I never have another century I'll be just fine. 12/12/12 was not kind to me. I hope your day was better my dear reader!
It was crazy from the start. I slumbered super hard, which made rising just as difficult. After snoozing numerous times, I dragged myself out of bed and started my morning routine. A routine that doesn't get shorter just because I woke up later. It just threw off my day entirely.
I felt good about the school day though, until it actually started. Whenever something is off schedule it's like the kids forget how to sit down. I want to scream "IT'S JUST TREAT SALE, COOL IT" but I don't, I just redirect them, 14 million times.
I was productive today though, writing all of my positive notes with my teacher soulmate. It's weird to think of my elementary teachers and picture them hanging out together after school. It's different being on the other side of things. So if you ever wondered what your teachers did after school, the answer is: hangout together while doing school work and imbibing. You're welcome for this valuable information. I'm sure it's true of all educators, well, any educator worth knowing.
Here is to a better tomorrow! 🍻
Today's pockets:
4 markers: 3 isn't enough
Eraser: aka a tissue
Highlighter: man my pockets suck today
It was crazy from the start. I slumbered super hard, which made rising just as difficult. After snoozing numerous times, I dragged myself out of bed and started my morning routine. A routine that doesn't get shorter just because I woke up later. It just threw off my day entirely.
I felt good about the school day though, until it actually started. Whenever something is off schedule it's like the kids forget how to sit down. I want to scream "IT'S JUST TREAT SALE, COOL IT" but I don't, I just redirect them, 14 million times.
I was productive today though, writing all of my positive notes with my teacher soulmate. It's weird to think of my elementary teachers and picture them hanging out together after school. It's different being on the other side of things. So if you ever wondered what your teachers did after school, the answer is: hangout together while doing school work and imbibing. You're welcome for this valuable information. I'm sure it's true of all educators, well, any educator worth knowing.
Here is to a better tomorrow! 🍻
Today's pockets:
4 markers: 3 isn't enough
Eraser: aka a tissue
Highlighter: man my pockets suck today
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Brrr
What a cold day! It didn't calm the students any. They were still crazy as every!
My mornings have gotten so much better, it's the afternoons, I call it the aftercrazy. The best part, and by best I mean most outlandish, was when a child ran back from the bus line and screamed that someone has used an obscenity. Not just that he had said a bad word, this nugget screamed the obscenity itself.
Like excuse me sir, you obviously know that the word is unacceptable, WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING IT AT THR TOP OF YOUR LUNGS, OUTSIDE!!!
Oh good lord, I thought I was going to die a little. Like what? Only my nuggets!
Lets just make it to Friday!!
Today's Pockets:
Cupcake eraser and mini chain: confiscated from the same child.
Marker: mhmm
2 pens: one is never enough
Stickers: bribery
My mornings have gotten so much better, it's the afternoons, I call it the aftercrazy. The best part, and by best I mean most outlandish, was when a child ran back from the bus line and screamed that someone has used an obscenity. Not just that he had said a bad word, this nugget screamed the obscenity itself.
Like excuse me sir, you obviously know that the word is unacceptable, WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING IT AT THR TOP OF YOUR LUNGS, OUTSIDE!!!
Oh good lord, I thought I was going to die a little. Like what? Only my nuggets!
Lets just make it to Friday!!
Today's Pockets:
Cupcake eraser and mini chain: confiscated from the same child.
Marker: mhmm
2 pens: one is never enough
Stickers: bribery
Monday, December 10, 2012
Potty problems
Oh, Monday! You didn't treat me too badly today. I swear, my relationship with Monday is similar to Chris Brown and Rhianna's. Sometimes he's good to me, other times he gives me a black eye!
I'm lucky to have come out of the day without a shiner. I do feel a little beat though. I'm ready for the Holidays for sure!
The biggest issue of the day: the bathroom. Three accidents and countless "no really, I can't hold it, I'm gonna use it on myself" later I want to bash my head against the wall. I don't use the bathroom all day, I've had bladder infections because of it, and these nuggets have to go every five seconds! It's obviously the reason the working age is 16, otherwise work would never get done due to potty breaks.
I bought all of my kiddos there Christmas presents, that there parents will hate! Love it!!! I'm ready to bring on the Christmas spirit, green pants and all!
Today's Pockets:
Marker:
2 pens: That constantly run out of ink
Post-its: for important messages
Stickers: rewards
Not pictured: a leap frog game that a kid handed me and said "is this a DS game!?"
A tinny magnetic house: where do children find these things?!?
I'm lucky to have come out of the day without a shiner. I do feel a little beat though. I'm ready for the Holidays for sure!
The biggest issue of the day: the bathroom. Three accidents and countless "no really, I can't hold it, I'm gonna use it on myself" later I want to bash my head against the wall. I don't use the bathroom all day, I've had bladder infections because of it, and these nuggets have to go every five seconds! It's obviously the reason the working age is 16, otherwise work would never get done due to potty breaks.
I bought all of my kiddos there Christmas presents, that there parents will hate! Love it!!! I'm ready to bring on the Christmas spirit, green pants and all!
Today's Pockets:
Marker:
2 pens: That constantly run out of ink
Post-its: for important messages
Stickers: rewards
Not pictured: a leap frog game that a kid handed me and said "is this a DS game!?"
A tinny magnetic house: where do children find these things?!?
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Day late, but not a dollar short!
Missed me?
Yesterday afternoon was super busy since we had the faculty KK party, so I didn't have time to write.
Friday was kind to me. I made it to 3:35 with little frustration! Having three students out made such a difference. I feel like the next two weeks are gonna be okay. I'm sure come the 21 I'll be more than ready for the break, but I'll make it!
Nothing really eventful happened during the school hours. It was later that things got interesting. Before the party began the hostess laid down the Vegas rule on the party so I won't share any stories.
Well maybe one. But it's out me, so it's not breaking the rule! I totally surprised my KK, which just so happened to be my teacher soulmate! I thought for sure she had figured it out since we converse daily. I was glad to see that I'm a much better liar than I thought I was. It was super fun to watch her stunned reaction!
And I got the bomb.com present! Wine, a glass, a personalized bottle opener and a book! Which I am about to dig into now that I'm dog sitting with nothing to do! Last night was a blast, I wish I could tell more! :)
Yesterday's Pockets:
Markers: yes 3
ZipLock bag: is that a normal pocket possession?
Yesterday afternoon was super busy since we had the faculty KK party, so I didn't have time to write.
Friday was kind to me. I made it to 3:35 with little frustration! Having three students out made such a difference. I feel like the next two weeks are gonna be okay. I'm sure come the 21 I'll be more than ready for the break, but I'll make it!
Nothing really eventful happened during the school hours. It was later that things got interesting. Before the party began the hostess laid down the Vegas rule on the party so I won't share any stories.
Well maybe one. But it's out me, so it's not breaking the rule! I totally surprised my KK, which just so happened to be my teacher soulmate! I thought for sure she had figured it out since we converse daily. I was glad to see that I'm a much better liar than I thought I was. It was super fun to watch her stunned reaction!
And I got the bomb.com present! Wine, a glass, a personalized bottle opener and a book! Which I am about to dig into now that I'm dog sitting with nothing to do! Last night was a blast, I wish I could tell more! :)
Yesterday's Pockets:
Markers: yes 3
ZipLock bag: is that a normal pocket possession?
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Snake mouth
Excuse me sir, HOW WAS TODAY NOT FRIDAY?!? I can't begin to explain today without fear of vomiting. I can only explain it with my über weird theory. You have no right to judge me. Today made my core shake, literally I was shaking from frustration and utter confusion. And the only way I could think of getting rid of these rather annoying vibrations was to unhinge my jaw like a snake and spit it all out.
Wow, I just put a whole lot of crazy out there in the first paragraph. You get what you pay for! "What? I'm not paying anything"...exactly.
I'm not sure if people are secretly promising Furby's to all my children if they act their craziest, but man today was horrific for me.
Have you ever had a teacher cry while teaching you math? Yeah well, my kids are probably taking a bath right now telling their mom about how Ms. Amanda cried while counting dots.
It was either cry or break a window. I figured they can't fire you for crying, but a broken window would raise a lot of questions and probably lead to anger management classes...ain't nobody got time for that!
Last week was painless and quick, like a shot. This is week was soul sucking and took forever, much like a foot tattoo.
Today's Pockets:
Squirrel silly band: confiscated from a kid who stole it from my desk after I confiscated it from another kid.
Eraser: not only for mistakes in writing
Paper clip: from holding together the math worksheet that the students didn't understand
Wow, I just put a whole lot of crazy out there in the first paragraph. You get what you pay for! "What? I'm not paying anything"...exactly.
I'm not sure if people are secretly promising Furby's to all my children if they act their craziest, but man today was horrific for me.
Have you ever had a teacher cry while teaching you math? Yeah well, my kids are probably taking a bath right now telling their mom about how Ms. Amanda cried while counting dots.
It was either cry or break a window. I figured they can't fire you for crying, but a broken window would raise a lot of questions and probably lead to anger management classes...ain't nobody got time for that!
Last week was painless and quick, like a shot. This is week was soul sucking and took forever, much like a foot tattoo.
Today's Pockets:
Squirrel silly band: confiscated from a kid who stole it from my desk after I confiscated it from another kid.
Eraser: not only for mistakes in writing
Paper clip: from holding together the math worksheet that the students didn't understand
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Empty
Sadly I have no treasures in my pockets today. For two reasons: 1 I'm in a pocketless dress and 2 I didn't go to school today due to a family funeral.
Days like today are hard but they also give you reality checks. You realize what and who is important and that you should let it be known.
It has to be said that my family is strange. Who would have thought that a funeral could bring up conversations about chicken farming, procreation and inappropriate comments about the personal lives of family members. There isn't a family gathering, no matter the reasoning, that goes without the most unexplainable range of topics!
Honestly I wouldn't have it any other way! They may be crazy but they are mine! I fear for the man I eventually bring into the tangled web of my mother's relatives!
So hold tight to your loved ones tonight and pray that Friday comes quickly!
Days like today are hard but they also give you reality checks. You realize what and who is important and that you should let it be known.
It has to be said that my family is strange. Who would have thought that a funeral could bring up conversations about chicken farming, procreation and inappropriate comments about the personal lives of family members. There isn't a family gathering, no matter the reasoning, that goes without the most unexplainable range of topics!
Honestly I wouldn't have it any other way! They may be crazy but they are mine! I fear for the man I eventually bring into the tangled web of my mother's relatives!
So hold tight to your loved ones tonight and pray that Friday comes quickly!
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Saw
I had my first throw up today in my classroom. Which was much like being selected to "play a game" by the creepy puppet from Saw. I was good at first, but then when a child showed me how it had reached his mat I thought for sure I would join in my sickly student's fate,
I held myself together long enough to make it through until the janitors saved me from what was sure to be an even bigger mess. I've never been good with vomit. But I've done my fair share of hair holding after a night out, it's what friends do!
Today I only have four friends who stayed on green, I was a maniac, pinning them down left and right. (Just I be clear, I didn't physically pin anyone to the floor or wall, I moved their clothespin). They stayed still at nap time though!
In the morning I thought I would go all Mommie Dearest on them, but I suppressed my crazy.
P.S. if you don't understand the Mommie Dearest reference then you seriously need to get on Amazon and order the movie now!
P.S.S. if you don't compare you life experiences to movies then I think you are a freak!
If you ever wondered "hey, do they sell eggs at a gas station" I have your answer; no! I thought purchasing eggs and beer at a gas station would be much more dignified than doing so at Wal-Mart, I'm probably right, but I'll never know. So I ending up at Walmart, checking out behind a parent who probably thought "what a strange combination" looking in my basket.
I'm now trying to clean my room, and by cleaning I mean throwing everything from the floor to the closet. And even that is exhausting! School sucks your soul out through your feet!
P.S. that was a bit dramatic, I take I back.
On to what you're really here for: today's pockets:
3 markers: deep pockets today
Highlighter: to sniff when I get low, totally kidding
$1.18: because I'm a baller
Spider toy: spit from the mouth of a nugget
Note: to remind me of something
Snack wrapper: teachers eat too
Cube, randomly given to me
I held myself together long enough to make it through until the janitors saved me from what was sure to be an even bigger mess. I've never been good with vomit. But I've done my fair share of hair holding after a night out, it's what friends do!
Today I only have four friends who stayed on green, I was a maniac, pinning them down left and right. (Just I be clear, I didn't physically pin anyone to the floor or wall, I moved their clothespin). They stayed still at nap time though!
In the morning I thought I would go all Mommie Dearest on them, but I suppressed my crazy.
P.S. if you don't understand the Mommie Dearest reference then you seriously need to get on Amazon and order the movie now!
P.S.S. if you don't compare you life experiences to movies then I think you are a freak!
If you ever wondered "hey, do they sell eggs at a gas station" I have your answer; no! I thought purchasing eggs and beer at a gas station would be much more dignified than doing so at Wal-Mart, I'm probably right, but I'll never know. So I ending up at Walmart, checking out behind a parent who probably thought "what a strange combination" looking in my basket.
I'm now trying to clean my room, and by cleaning I mean throwing everything from the floor to the closet. And even that is exhausting! School sucks your soul out through your feet!
P.S. that was a bit dramatic, I take I back.
On to what you're really here for: today's pockets:
3 markers: deep pockets today
Highlighter: to sniff when I get low, totally kidding
$1.18: because I'm a baller
Spider toy: spit from the mouth of a nugget
Note: to remind me of something
Snack wrapper: teachers eat too
Cube, randomly given to me
Monday, December 3, 2012
Manday
Have you ever had a day that you realized that everything that happened in your past was suppose to happen? That without those moments that you thought were so terrible needed to take place to have things all fit together presently? Yeah, I'm still waiting for that magic to happen while questioning my choices.
I really do feel bad for Mondays. Poor guy, hated just for existing. Do you think he would have chosen to be the first day of the work week? No, I'm sure they voted when he was on vacation or just pulled the short straw. I wouldn't want to be hated as much as Mondays are hated. I'm probably an a-hole for assuming that Monday is a dude, but I feel that a woman would have long since left this abusive relationship.
Today's nap time made jail seem like a luxurious spa! It's the last two hours of the day that make me feel as if I might burst into flames, or fall into convulsions, or start scream singing "losing my religion" by R.E.M.
I get it, I really do, I wasn't a napper either. I just wish the nuggets would understand the regret they will feel when they are sitting in their 10th grade math class wishing for a moment of slumber.
I guess you can only teach them so much! To add to the joy of my day, the new Dexter isn't on demand yet, so sad. Why must life be so cold?
Today's Pockets:
A nautical shell- a gift from a nugget, why?
Markers: shocking.
Pen: for writing notes home, pleading for mercy, kidding, sorta.
I really do feel bad for Mondays. Poor guy, hated just for existing. Do you think he would have chosen to be the first day of the work week? No, I'm sure they voted when he was on vacation or just pulled the short straw. I wouldn't want to be hated as much as Mondays are hated. I'm probably an a-hole for assuming that Monday is a dude, but I feel that a woman would have long since left this abusive relationship.
Today's nap time made jail seem like a luxurious spa! It's the last two hours of the day that make me feel as if I might burst into flames, or fall into convulsions, or start scream singing "losing my religion" by R.E.M.
I get it, I really do, I wasn't a napper either. I just wish the nuggets would understand the regret they will feel when they are sitting in their 10th grade math class wishing for a moment of slumber.
I guess you can only teach them so much! To add to the joy of my day, the new Dexter isn't on demand yet, so sad. Why must life be so cold?
Today's Pockets:
A nautical shell- a gift from a nugget, why?
Markers: shocking.
Pen: for writing notes home, pleading for mercy, kidding, sorta.
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